This has been quite the year for change. After many years of putting it off, I finally decided to try to get into law school. Mission accomplished. Now the task becomes staying in law school and jumping through the hoops placed in front of me. I don’t intend to be dismissive of what happens in a U.S. law school, but I will say that I have felt on more than one occasion as-a-ribbon-wearing poodle must feel in a circus. The image of the poor poodle trying to walk on his hind legs (which he has not yet evolved to do…) comes to mind. This is how I feel just about every day, hour, and minute that I am in law school…. This is also the year that I learned I am really, truly not superwoman (collective gasp). Though I worked all through my undergraduate years and through graduate school, law school is quite unlike anything I have ever tried to accomplish and I find it requires my utmost attention. Working while attending has proven to be an immense distraction and probably not the greatest idea I’ve ever had. Adjustments, however, will have to wait until next year.
However, I must admit that law school has managed to accomplish something that nothing to date has (and that I clearly needed)–it has provided me with a plethora of opportunities to engage in exercises of humility. I’ve made some realizations about myself this year that lead me to conclude some very important changes need to made on this journey of life. I won’t get into specifics because I don’t think these are as important as the big picture of knowing that in order to move forward, certain things must be left behind. I think this might be the point of forgiveness (and forgiving oneself is included in this edict)—being able to move ahead without all the encumbrances that grudges so deeply embed in the soul. I have my work cut out for me this year with regards to my desire for holiness…that much I know is true!
On a lighter front, I have made an end of the year libation to bring with me to my brother’s house (where I’ll be ringing in this upcoming year of our Lord Two Thousand and Twelve): coquito. It was my first attempt and I think I did a really good job (so much for humility). I have also decided to begin attending Holy Mass in Latin…. To quote the grandmother in Sleepless in Seattle: “I liked it better when it was in Latin and you couldn’t understand anything.” Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with the Roman Ritual in English, it is all the editorializing (priestly and laity) I can do without. Tridentine, Novus Ordo really doesn’t matter…as long as the parish doesn’t believe that the last legitimate Pontiff was Piux XII, I’m good to go.
Happy New Year and here’s toasting a healthy and holy 2012 to all my friends. And for those of you that cringe at the word, holy, relax—to be holy is to be fully human. So, by all means, let’s all try to make 2012 more holy.